January 18, 2014

Fresh Flesh

Time for our monthly scream. Gah!

We Are What We Are (2013): Well, what do you know; a horror movie with an actual storyline. “We Are What We Are” is an English-language remake of a Mexican horror film of the same title (Somos Lo Que Hay) but don’t let that scare you away; not all remakes are horrible, apparently. Great performances by everyone involved. I also loved the cinematography and the slow-paced formula which usually works fine with me. Putting food on the table can be tough.

Haunter (2013): It kinda felt like I was watching an episode of “Friday the 13th” (the 80’s cult series) rather than a movie. There’s nothing cinematic about “Haunter”. Abigail Breslin, (whom I absolutely adored in “Little Miss Sunshine”), played the role of the teen ghost with unnecessary exaggeration – to the point she got on my nerves. The only thing I liked about this movie was the posters on Lisa’s wall, to be honest.

You’re Next (2013): I thought this was going to be a disaster (both trailer and teaser pointed to that direction) but, surprisingly enough, it wasn’t that bad. It wasn’t a masterpiece neither but I didn’t yawn much so, I guess I liked it in the end. MacGyver had a bastard, apparently, and she grew to become a ninja. Deep down, I bet she wants a Barbie doll.

Nothing Left To Fear (2013): Slash vs Slasher. And by Slash I mean indeed Slash, the guitar player. He produced this film and also composed the score and the closing theme song (with Myles Kennedy on vocals). Predictable, full of clich├ęs. If you think the Gateways to Hell are in Stull, think again. Clancy Brown is in it, though.

Insidious Chapter 2 (2013): One of my comedy picks for 2013 (was that too harsh?). I was happy to see Lin Shaye reprise her role as Elise (the dead won’t stay dead – hooray!) and she’ll probably be doing it again on the next one so, I’ll be watching the third chapter as well, I guess (damn it). I was expecting more. I really liked the atmosphere on the first one, not to mention the set (busted - I have a thing for "antiques vs. IKEA" decorated houses). Poorly written and executed. However, it did great at the box office and that’s what counts.

The Curse of Chucky (2013): Too bad it went straight to DVD. Not that it would do well in theatres but, for the hell of it. Typical Chucky film made with equal parts of bloodbath and humour. A lot of familiar faces, too. Wait through the end credits;-)

World War Z (2013): Not as horrible as everybody’s been telling me. It’s an OK film to watch (once), over chips.

Evidence (2013) Found footage movie. I only watched this because Stephen Moyer was in it – there, I said it!

Evil Dead (2013): So many ways to cut a limb off; and so little time to do it. Probably the worst horror movie I have watched in a long, long time. Nothing but a gore fest - no wonder everybody else praised it.
-So, will it be the chainsaw or the electric knife?
-The remote, thank you.

The Colony (2013): Blue tints, cannibals and Laurence Fishburne. Interesting concept - survival can turn you into an animal, no doubt about that. After Fishburne’s character died, I sort of lost my interest – oops.